Cole (A Wolf Shifter Romance Novel) (The Steelman Shifters Book 1) Page 3

“Yes.” A pained look flashed across his eyes and he looked at the ground as he spoke. “I had a girlfriend. Human. She wasn’t my mate, but I was in love with her, and I even had Tristan’s blessing to claim her.”

  I regretted asking this now because I could almost predict where this was going.

  “Anyway,” he continued, swallowing thickly. “One night she got jumped by a pack of wolves. I didn’t even hesitate when I tore apart every single one of them. My wolf loved it. Hell, I loved it. Megan? Not so much. She never looked at me the same way again.”

  “Dane…”

  “Don’t, Hayley. There is nothing you can say anyway. I told you because if you ever feel like you are losing control to your wolf, you’re not alone. Any pack member will help you in those moments, okay? Please don’t feel ashamed by it.”

  “Okay.” The atmosphere in the room had turned sombre, and Dane rose.

  “I’ll tell Tristan you are ready.”

  “What?” I scrambled from the floor. “Really?”

  “Yeah. Honestly, the hardest task for you was the shifting. This? I only did it so you had time to think about your decision.”

  “Right. Thank you,” I smiled, nerves fluttering in my belly. “What do we do during this?”

  “That’s up to you, I think. I’m not sure. Let’s go ask Tristan.”

  Dane held the door open for me and we made our way across the hall to the tactical room. Dane knocked twice on the door, and Tristan called us to go in. I barely heard him over the sound of my pounding heart.

  “Hayley, relax,” Tristan said, chuckling. “What’s happened?”

  “I think she’s ready,” Dane answered, taking up his position at the door again. His arms were folded, and he gave me a wink when I made eye contact with him. His earlier low mood had vanished, and I was glad I hadn’t left him feeling like shit.

  “Excellent. So, have you made your decision?” Tristan’s eyes locked onto mine and I couldn’t look away. Oh no – I was breaking the rules already.

  I nodded. “I’d like to join.”

  “Martha will be relieved,” he said, breaking the contact. I stared at the table as he spoke, worried I’d break the rules again. “Now, would you like a big ceremony? Dancing? Food?”

  “Absolutely not. Not after the last party I went to… Can we do small? Private?”

  The men shared a look over my shoulder again. “We can arrange that,” Tristan said. “Make sure you are here by six tonight.”

  “What do I wear?” I asked.

  “Whatever you want.” He shrugged. “If it was a ceremony then yes, everyone would dress up. You’ll be fine in whatever tonight.”

  “Okay. Thank you, Tristan. I won’t let you down,” I promised, my heart still pounding in my chest as though I had just been for a run.

  “It’ll be alpha to you,” he said, and smiled at me.

  I pressed my lips together and raced out of the room, full of nerves. Dane stayed with him, and I heard their low voices as the door clicked shut. I was relieved they didn’t say anything about me. My nan was going to pick me up today, and she would be here any moment.

  No one was around downstairs giving me the opportunity to look around. It was a large room, like everything else around here, with multiple sofas and armchairs. I settled into one of them as I surveyed the place. There were random books, food wrappers, and glasses lying around. It was clearly a high-traffic area, but it felt very homey.

  “Come on, Hayley. I’m ageing out here.” My nan shook my shoulder. I had fallen asleep while waiting for her. My dreams were plagued with nightmares, and I hadn’t had a proper night’s sleep since my parents died.

  “Nan, do we have a grave for Mum and Dad?”

  She visibly flinched as I followed her out of the Steelmans’ home. “I’m afraid not, dear. Why would you need one?”

  “So that I can visit?”

  “Sweetheart,” she turned to me and tapped my chest, directly over my heart, “they are right here with you, all the time. Don’t get worked up over a bit of stone.”

  I stifled a sigh. She didn’t get it, but I couldn’t press her. I kept reminding myself that she had lost her son, too, and we were all coping in different ways.

  “I’m joining the pack,” I said, sliding into the passenger side of her new car.

  “Oh, excellent. Tristan is a good alpha, and you will learn a lot.”

  “I guess.”

  ✽✽✽

  I spotted Kian and Cole immediately when I returned to the Steelman house that evening. They were fighting again and, if I didn’t know any different, I’d have assumed they were brothers. Spotting my arrival, Kian jogged over to me and pulled me into a tight hug.

  “Christ, Kian. Let her breathe,” Cole said, chuckling behind him. “Congrats, Hayley.”

  When he held out his arms for a hug, I stepped into them willingly. His scent enveloped me, and I couldn’t place why I felt like this around him. I needed to get over my crush on him before it ended up being embarrassing for me. When he let me go, I could have sworn I felt his reluctance, but I ignored it.

  “I’m so nervous,” I admitted, bouncing on my feet. I had opted for a casual dress with some pumps, I didn’t want to go over the top, but this was going to be important for me. The guys were both in slacks and shirts, and they looked great in them.

  Get a grip, Hayley.

  I followed them into the house and was relieved to see the living area was still empty.

  “There are a few people out the back that need to witness this, but we have kept the audience to a minimum for you,” Kian said, noticing that I was looking around. “We came because we are taking you out to celebrate afterwards.”

  “Out?” I asked.

  “We could stay in instead, if you’d prefer?” It was as though Cole could read my mind.

  “It’s up to you,” Kian grinned.

  My heart warmed at their words and I felt something flutter in my stomach. Is this what belonging felt like?

  Tristan was waiting at the top of the garden, a knife in his hand. There were intricate patterns on the handle that I could make out a few feet away. I gulped when I noticed how sharp it was.

  Cole’s warm hand came to rest on my back for a moment. “Relax. It doesn’t hurt… much.”

  “Thanks,” I drawled. “That was really reassuring.”

  He smirked and stood with Kian to the side. There were a few people here that I didn’t recognise, but Dane gave me a warm smile when I spotted him on Tristan’s side. I tried to will my nerves to settle as I knew everyone around could detect them.

  “This shouldn’t take long, Hayley.” Tristan said, holding out his hand. I placed my hand in his, feeling how warm he was. I really hoped he couldn’t detect how cold and clammy mine were.

  “What exactly do I need to do?”

  “I’m just going to cut your finger. Think of it like a blood-bond.”

  I glanced over at the people watching. Kian was beaming, while Cole just gave me a small nod. I swallowed and watched as Tristan pressed the blade into my finger.

  “Yes,” my wolf whined. “At last.”

  My heart rate picked up, but Tristan gave me a knowing smile. The was only a little pain before he pricked his own finger. It all felt a little ridiculous to me, and I had to bite my lip to stop myself from giggling. Cole’s snort in the background was not helping me keep it at bay.

  “Holy shit,” I breathed, when Tristan pressed his finger to mine.

  I felt a subtle shift in the atmosphere around us. It was like I was weightless for a moment before a bunch of feelings hit all at once.

  I could feel Dane’s pain of losing Megan.

  Kian’s excitement for something.

  Cole’s pride.

  Tristan’s nerves.

  Another man’s fear.

  What. The. Hell.

  It was overwhelming and, as I was about to scream, it came to an abrupt stop. Tristan was holding onto my arms, telling me to breathe.


  “That’s it, Hayley. It’ll pass soon.”

  “What the fuck was that?” I gasped.

  “Someone should have told you that it can be a bit much at first. You joined the pack and swore in like Dane discussed with you. You will be able to feel each other’s emotions when you are close, like now. It was actually better we didn’t do it as a large ceremony.”

  There were a few murmurs of agreement. Kian wrapped his arm around me and gave me a squeeze.

  “I suppose you can officially be our friend now.”

  I met his green eyes and couldn’t help but smile back. Cole stood to the side of us, his hands casually in his pockets. I briefly wondered what he was proud of but I couldn’t find the courage to ask him.

  “You think learning this was easy? It was just a warm-up. Now we have to teach you about high school,” he joked.

  I rolled my eyes. “Someone, save me.”

  They snickered and we went back into the house. The people who watched wished me a congratulations, and with each hug I received, I felt myself becoming lighter. I belonged here, and it was incredible.

  I looked over at my two friends who were arguing about which was better – Pepsi or Coke?

  Thank God, they were normal. Maybe moving here wouldn’t be so bad after all.

  ✽✽✽

  Cole

  “Finally got a young girl in the pack,” Kian commented. “Urgh. I hope my dad doesn’t set up a mating claim with her.”

  I nearly crushed the drink I was holding. “He won’t.”

  Kian gave me a funny look, but changed the subject when Hayley joined us. She looked beautiful in her dress, with her dark hair curled at the ends. Feminine. I wanted to wrap my arms around her and hide her far away from Kian, and his potentially scheming dad.

  “How do you feel?” Kian asked her, handing her a drink.

  “Different. It feels like I always should have been here, though. I never thought I’d miss something I didn’t have.”

  I nodded in agreement, but Kian scrunched up his nose. “Nope, don’t get. Sorry.” He shrugged, a cheeky grin on his face. “Come on, I want to show you the games room since we aren’t going out.”

  “Games room?” Her eyes met mine and she blushed when I smiled at her. A beep in my pocket distracted me from responding.

  I followed on autopilot as they went upstairs.

  Mum: Get home, now.

  Mum: Where are you?

  Mum: This better not be pack business. Your dad won’t be happy.

  Mum: Cole Anderson! Get home NOW.

  Me: I’m on my way.

  I cringed the whole time I was reading through my texts.

  “Guys, I gotta go. My parents are on my case.”

  “Already?” Kian said. “Shit. Is it bad?”

  I caught Hayley’s eye and she gave me a puzzled look. I wanted to keep my family drama as far away from her as possible, and I hoped Kian understood that.

  “Yeah. I’ll see you both tomorrow?”

  I didn’t wait for their response as I jogged back down the stairs. I overheard Hayley asking what that was about, but I didn’t hear Kian’s response. Fortunately, Dane was about to get into the car so I wasn’t going to have to walk home.

  “Dane!” I called after him and he paused. “Please can you give me a lift home?”

  “Jesus, Cole. Learn to drive already.”

  “I’m fourteen,” I said, hopping into the car.

  “Oh, really? Christ. Tell me why you always look older then?”

  I shrugged, looking out of the window. “I don’t know.”

  “If you ever want to talk about your parents—”

  “Nope. I’m good.”

  “Alright.”

  We spent the rest of the drive in silence. If I was to open up to anyone, it probably would be Dane. He was much calmer and easier to approach than Tristan, but I knew the first thing he would do was tell the alpha. I felt like clamming up whenever he approached me about it though, and for the life of me I couldn’t figure out why.

  “Cole,” Dane sighed, as he pulled up on the street behind my house. “For what it’s worth, you’re a good kid. No matter what goes on inside those four walls, remember that, yeah?”

  “Thanks, Dane,” I muttered, sliding out of the car. I shoved my hands into my pockets and walked with my head down. I didn’t exactly live in the nicest part of town and, if I got caught up in any trouble, it would only make me later.

  Before I even had chance to slide the key into the lock, my dad opened the door.

  “Where the fuck have you been?” He demanded.

  “With the pack. We have a new pack member. Didn’t you notice?”

  “Of course I noticed,” he snapped, finally standing aside to let me in. “Why weren’t we invited?”

  “She wanted a small ceremony, not a party.”

  “She?” My mum piped up. She was sat on the sofa in the living room, a magazine in her lap. “Name?”

  “Hayley. Hayley Morton.” I brushed past them, relieved there wasn’t going to be a fight.

  My parents shared a look I couldn’t decipher, but I didn’t even bother trying anymore. They got up to all sorts when I wasn’t around, and I think it was best I didn’t know. Tristan trusted them enough to join the pack, so I guess I would have to, too.

  “Not so fast, Cole.” My dad said, grabbing my arm. I swallowed hard, willing myself to keep my anger in check.

  “What now?” I demanded.

  His grip tightened. “Don’t give me that attitude.”

  My mum returned her attention to her magazine, like she always did when my dad was hurting me.

  Why don’t you stick up for me? I felt like screaming at her. This happened every night, right under her fucking nose.

  “I’m not giving you attitude. Let me go.”

  My dad grabbed me by my throat and slammed me against the door. I desperately tried to find my wolf that was apparently supposed to be a part of me, but there was nothing. I was on my own against a man three times the size of me.

  “When your mother texts you to tell you to get home, you do it. We wanted to have a nice family evening tonight, but you ruined it.”

  “Yeah,” I rasped, his fingers digging into my windpipe. “I ruin everything.”

  He smirked. “Well then, it is a good job I know how to punish you then, isn’t it?”

  I closed my eyes the whole time, taking myself to a happy place. If I fought back it would only get worse. I needed to bide my time, wait for my wolf to present itself. If I was similar strength to my dad now, it wouldn’t be long until I overtook him.

  When I closed my eyes this time, it was a young woman with hazel eyes looking back at me.

  Chapter 4

  Cole

  A few weeks later, I unlocked the front door to my house, surprised to see my parents together and actually getting along for once. I kept the relationship I had with my parents away from my friends because they would never understand. Hayley cried every night, grieving hers, and Kian had a healthy relationship with his for the most part, despite the power struggle he had with his dad.

  Me? My parents enjoyed screaming and hitting each other. Often, they hit me too. Violence bled through these walls, and I could probably explain the fight behind every damaged bit of plasterboard.

  “Hello, sweetie. It’s good to see you home on time for once.” My mum plastered a fake smile on her face. “We were hoping to have a family dinner, just the three of us.”

  I inherited my blue eyes from her, and it always startled me when she looked directly at me. My dad was the opposite to us, with his dark eyes, but I did have his large build. A few more years and I would probably overtake him. I couldn’t wait for that day to arrive.

  “Why?” I asked, tossing my rucksack on the floor and making my way over to the worktop to inspect the food my mum made. It was a lasagne, and my stomach rumbled in appreciation for the smell.

  “Don’t disrespect your mum like that,
son,” my dad remarked, making me cringe.

  “I wasn’t being disrespectful,” I said, my voice calm. “I was only asking why. We never spend time together.”

  “Exactly. We want to change that.” The fake smile was back on mum’s face and I held back my eye roll.

  “Right. I’m getting changed.” I tugged at my school tie as I made my way up to my room. My parents were muttering between themselves about how ungrateful I was.

  How ungrateful I was? Fucking hypocrites.

  I got them into the Steelman pack – Tristan wanted nothing to do with them. I suppose he knew something I didn’t though, and it wouldn’t be for the first time. My phone pinged in my pocket and I pulled it out with a smile. There were only a few select people with my number since I often forgot to respond.

  Hayley: Hey. Are you free tonight? I could really do with a friend.

  Me: I have a family dinner to go to, but I can come around as soon as it’s done?

  Hayley: Family dinner? Lucky you.

  If only you knew, Hales.

  Me: I guess. So, can I come around later?

  Hayley: Yeah. Kian can’t make it so it’ll just be us? I hope that’s okay.

  Me: Sure.

  It actually sounded perfect to me, but I couldn’t say that. Hayley was… was everything to me. She was my wolf’s mate, and a close friend of mine, but I wouldn’t be able to handle it if she told me she didn’t feel the same way.

  All shifters had mates, exactly like a soul mate, but there was a high chance you would never meet yours. The fact I had so soon was rare, apparently, and I knew I was lucky, but I had to play my cards right. I was only going to have one shot at this, and I couldn’t afford to fuck it up.

  There was also the fact she wouldn’t tell me what happened the night she came to live here. It weighed on my mind a lot, and I tried not to let it drive a wedge between us, but I just wanted to climb her walls and find out everything about her.

  I had a quick shower before retreating back downstairs to face the music. No fucking idea why they want this dinner, but I’m sure it was actually so they could stage an intervention. I never do anything wrong, but they always find something.